It seems recently
that every radio talk show host calling has the
same question. Ditto each magazine reporter. Everyone
wants to talk about labioplasty: surgically trimming
the labia to look like a porn star’s.
I’ve been
around long enough to remember attending women’s
health conferences in the early 70s where we considered
ourselves brave and liberated for looking at our
own cervixes with mirrors and flashlights. I
once lay head to head with another woman as a parade
of onlookers circled us, each bending to peer into
our specula-stretched vaginas. One matron
straightened, alarmed, and alerted me, “My
dear, you have blood up there!” I
responded that I had my period. Her face
worked for a moment as she processed this information. Then
she smiled. “Oh, yes,” she nodded, “of
course that’s where it comes from,” and
she moved down the line. We knew so little
of ourselves then that we prized each new piece
of knowledge and power.
Fast forward three
decades. Now periods are optional and the
thrill of ownership of our genitals is eclipsed
by the anxiety of comparing them to the perfect
digitally retouched porno pussy. Sigh.
Labia are like faces. All
have the same basic parts yet each is distinct. Labia
are filled with sensitive nerve endings that deliver
the most exquisite sensations when swollen and
treated nicely. Beneath the skin of the labia
lie the crura or legs of the clitoris (the hard
round button tucked under the clitoral hood is
but a fraction of the organ). Since the labia are
rarely symmetrical, each responds a bit differently
to touch, providing more and varied sensations
as we climb towards orgasm. Many women use
knowledge of these anatomical differences during
masturbation. As we get closer to orgasm,
we may pull on that slightly larger left labia
to increase traction on the clitoral hood, for
instance. The wise lover will pay attention
to these details and explore his/her lover’s
geography to learn the many available exciting
pleasure paths.
Labioplasty has
nothing to do with pleasure. Zero, zip, nada,
zilch. Trimming your pussy lips to be tiny,
tight, and symmetrical is entirely about meeting
some theoretical perception of what the ‘perfect’ woman’s
labia is ‘supposed’ to look like. This
month. Considering we can’t see our
own vulva without a mirror and a flashlight, genital
plastic surgery certainly isn’t about our
own visual satisfaction. Is it solely in response
to what we believe are the wishes of our male partners?
But if you ask most men to describe the ugliest
pussy they ever saw, they’ll quickly respond, “It
was beautiful!”
So why are women
submitting to this surgery? We’ve already
bought that our breasts are too small, our bottoms
not appropriately peachy, our thighs too cottage
cheesy, and our stomachs too slack. Our icon
models are anorexic waifs while our real life population
gets fatter and fatter. Perfection seems
ever more unattainable.
Each of us owns
our own body and has every right to do with it
whatever we want. No question. It
troubles me greatly, though, that so much emphasis
is placed on appearance with barely a reference
to function or pleasure.
Before we consider
removing the tissues that cause us to call out
God’s name, let’s think hard about
what we are doing and why. If you feel that
your relationship would be improved by having slimmer
labia, examine your relationship! Invest
in a copy of Joani Blank’s book, Femalia, and
celebrate the beauty and diversity of the women’s
vulvas photographed in those pages. If you
want to change the appearance of your netherlips,
get a piercing or shave your pubic hair, but please,
think twice before surgically altering your tender
bits. Remember: fashion changes, but pleasure
is forever.
© 2006. Pega Ren,
Ed.D. All Rights Reserved.